Open Windows

So....I finally found a job after a relatively quick 2.5 months....I start on the 11th and I'm so excited!!!

I've always been a big fan of "when God closes a door, somewhere He opens a window." (Thanks, Julie Andrews and The Sound of Music!) In the last couple of months, it feels like The Big Guy (God, Yahweh, Jehovah, Whatever you'd like to call Him) has been throwing open every single window in my life....

Ironically, the job I landed came through a staffing agency that saw my resume online and thought I'd be a good fit. I hate the idea of 90 days-temp-to-hire, but I really think it will work out ok. It's a FANTASTIC job (at least on paper so far)and I honestly feel blessed to be given this opportunity.

I've loved the time I've been able to spend with my daughter, the time I've finally had to work on my family history stuff and just the general break in the craziness of life. I've also wrestled and put away a lot of personal issues that have needed to be settled for a long time. Having time to think really does that for you....

The one mar on this late spring/early summer awesomeness is my allergies this year.

I've always had the coughy/sneezy/pot smokin' red, itchy eyes that most people with seasonal allergies get, but this rare year, I got THE HIVES.

It doesn't happen every year, but the years it does, it's bad(thus the big caps.) Spontaneously I will break out in hand sized welt-like hives all over my body.

I'm the Incredible Hiving Moxie during these moments and I can't do anything about them but try to overdose on Benadryll. I never, ever take allergy medicine (I like to suffer or I'm stupid, I don't know), but when I get THE HIVES it's a quick trip to Walgreens for the happy, take away the crazy hives medicine.

Did I mention I had one of these attacks right before a job interview last month? Yep, I sure did. Luckily, clothes concealed my crazy shame. I itched my way through the interview!

The worst THE HIVES incident was 9 years ago on Handsome's college graduation day. Right in the middle of the ceremony, I broke out from head to foot in large, awful hives.

People stared.

My mother-in-law, the nurse, wanted to rush me to the hospital.

I was mildly freaking out, but I carried on....

All in all, it was a great break and I'm looking forward to my new job. It kind of freaks me out to realize how ready I was for my last job to end. I didn't have the courage to leave and I kept thinking things would get better, but honestly, after reflection, it's a release to be gone.

The Lord indeed works in mysterious ways.

It sucks that we won't be able to afford to go to California to see Handsome's sister's new baby in December and we've had to put off our "put new siding on the house" project mid-way through (I'm still hoping we can do it in Sept.), but we thankfully are coming through this momentary financial crisis relatively unscathed.

And for that, I'm thankful. Thank you Baby Jesus and the Easter Bunny for the miracles!

And thanks, Big Guy, once more for seeing me through something that seemed insurmountable.

You really do work in mysterious ways!!!

downsized....

3 weeks ago today was the first day in 8 years, 4 months, 2 weeks and 2 days that I didn't go to a full time job.

I was downsized....

It doesn't help that it wasn't my boss' decision...

It doesn't help that I got a great severance package...

It doesn't help that it wasn't my fault...

I felt empty...worthless...

Up until that point I had only been married 6 weeks longer than I had that job.

I had my daughter while I had that job.

I bought my first house while I had that job.

My husband and I have been through so much since I first got that job...

It was the sustaining thing through so much financial early-marriage chaos...

I was always "The Bread Winner"...

I knew it was probably coming, but I was in denial...

In January, our corporate office "restructured" the company. I was nervous and asked my boss what that meant for me. I was only one of a few "local" marketing managers left in 128 branches in the US and Canada. I kept my job for so long after so many of us fell.

I always knew my boss valued my work and that he'd keep me if he could.

Fuck it.

I kept my job because I was better than Corporate at getting results and up til now they couldn't find a reason to fire me legitimately. That's not an exaggeration.

I always played by the brand standards: used the right logos, fonts, graphics, but the ideas that really worked were all a local collaboration between the GM, the Sales Manager and me....

In January, the GM (some one who has been so inspirational as a business person to me) told me that if I was going to be eliminated, it would have already happened.

I was stupid and I believed him.

He hadn't let me down in the 5 years that I'd known him.

I have to give him a little bit of credit.

He fought for me and I don't doubt it.

He couldn't look me in the eye that day and had someone (that I HATE) do it...

But...he did say,

"I'm sorry, Moxie....I was the very last hold out. I did everything that I could. I'm the last of 128. I've fought for you for so long, but they won't let me any more. I'll do anything I can to help you find something else..."

Bleak comfort....right?

Strangely, I thought I'd be upset, but I wasn't.

I'd been unhappy for about a year and a half, REALLY unhappy since January. I knew it was time to go a long time ago, but I held on because it was familiar and because of the friends I'd made....We watched our kids grow up together, we weathered SO many financial challenges and creative differences together....it was like a family....

I was in firm denial.

But, done is done, am I right?

But, what really hurts is the fact that ONLY 2 HOURS after I finished a huge project, I was called in to the front office and let go... 2:15 pm on April 18th, 2011...

I'm still a little freaked out about the calm I felt.

I thought I'd cry...

I didn't.

I thought it would be harder...

It wasn't...

It was a weird calm and a rush of release.

It was all over and I didn't have to be stressed about that place again.

I just hated that it was so abrupt.

That my health insurance ran out at midnight that night.

That I didn't get the chance to say good bye to some of the most wonderful people I've known over the last 8.5 years.

Sure, I'll call those people in the next few weeks, tell them I'm doing fine and etc. and etc. but....I can't do it right now.

I hate job hunting. I hate the fact that business people lump "Sales and Marketing" together and think I want to be a salesperson.

Fuck that.

Let me create a campaign!!!

Let me strategize, design, implement and track something so I can see solid results.

I've known salespeople, and I'm not a salesperson. I hate getting junk mail promising me unrealistic amounts of money if I become a salesperson for XYZ BS Company.

I don't want to sell, I want to Market.

I'm a strategist.

I love the hunt and the target and the kill.

I love the rush of making someone who "hates junk mail and advertising" call us up anyway...

Sigh....

If you know any Marketing jobs in KC for someone with 10+ years of "roll your sleeves up and get results" marketing experience, let me know...

I hate sitting still...I need a job!

RetroGag: Valentines One

There's no way I can do this series with a straight face...


So let's make fun of some historical shit...whadda ya say?

First up:
Cheesy-ness:

Yeah...ummm...I'm crazy...and I LOVE YOU!

Let's commit arson together..That's HOTT!!


A special kinda KC Lovin'...If you've never imagined licking bbq sauce offa somebody, this valentine ain't meant for you...It's a KC BBQ thing...


I love you so much, baby, it burns like the clap!!!


My pussy says "Meow" boys... grrr...

Creepy, non?

Ummm...dude? Don't try to take your love through airport security...I say this as a friend...


Ok, Constant Reader...get ready for an epic journey of awkward lovin' over the next coupla days...I'm addicted to these creepy, crazy, retro-lovin' Valentines....

RetroGag: Valentines....

One of the most interesting parts of my job as a part-time historian is discovering what other people think is "historical and priceless.."

People bring stuff into the museum I work for all the time. They think it's a precious historical document that must be preserved. 3/4 of the time they are right...

Recently I was hit with an incredible historical cache.

The motherlode of awesomeness....a rare find!!

Boxes and boxes of crap/historical awesomeness. Ex: a bumper sticker that promoted LBJ for president, a clipping from the KC Star in April 1912 talking about the Titanic going down, a lady's ciggerette case from the 1920's, an invite to the Priests of Pallas Parade..

Incredible stuff...

The thing that really struck me was a collection of Valentines from about the 1930's... They are so fragile, intricate and amazing as pieces of artwork. Someone kept these for 70-80 years and they certainly aren't the cheap copy paper versions that I looked at in Target the other day that feature SpongeBob, Hannah Montana and My Little Ponies for Darling's 1st grade class.

I'm amazed at the thoughtfulness people once put into sending these pieces...

Back in the era of sending things via the post office, I think Valentines meant more...

I pondered this and today I ran across a collection of Valentines in one of my favorite blogs "Found in Mom's Basement". Nostaglia lovers, if you haven't found this blog yet, you're slacking...

In the true spirit of mocking things vintage, I've decided to feature some crazy vintage ads over the next couple of days...


Stay tuned, Constant Reader, and help me decipher these Odes to Love from Eras Past...

Happy Blogiversary to Me!! (Belatedly of Course)

Hard to believe it but I started this crazy ol' blog back on Jan. 24, 2008.

3 whole years!

It doesn't seem like it's been that long at all, and I've definitely decreased my frequency in the last year, but I'm hoping to do better this year.

Considering the fact that most blogs fizzle out soon after creation, I guess the fact that I still sporadically post should at least mean something. (Can you hear me justifying my lack of posts in my head?)

Any who, thanks to all my Constant Readers who still stick around!

If you're twisted and demented and like statistics, I found two really interesting articles on blogs:
Interesting, but a bit dated.
Technorati's 2010 State of the Blogosphere.

Enjoy!