Tuesday, June 30, 2009

I've been quiet about the whole celebrity death-athon we've seemingly been on in the last week mainly because I dug Charlie's Angels, but had no real interest in the career (or hair) of Farrah Fawcett.

Likewise with Michael Jackson, I really stopped caring about him once he started becoming really, really weird and made mostly out of plastic. Sure, I tried to moonwalk in my day, I know the words to all his most popular songs and my sticker book in second grade was full of Thriller stickers, but he just wasn't my thing.

Their passings were sad, but we knew Farrah was dying so it kind of eased the blow, and I contend that the real Michael Jackson died years ago shortly after his sanity snapped. (Of course, I'm intrigued by emawkc's fabulous conspiracy theory, since I love theories like that.)

I was very surprised about Billy Mays. I loved that guy because he contridicted most rules of good marketing.

He was cheesy.

He was very, very loud.

He sold products with too-good-to-be-true claims.


He was convincing.

You know you had your credit card ready for the operators standing by.

You believed in what he was selling because he told you it was awesome.

He could make you stop what you were doing and watch him shill for OxyClean, OrangeGlow, etc.

Billy Mays was a self-made man, and don't we just love that in America, The Land of Opportunity? You could tell he was a genuine guy if you ever watched his show Pitchmen.

In a crazy world of late night infomercials with characters like the guy in the question mark suit who wants to show you how to get millions of dollars in government grants, Mama Cleo and her fake Jaimaican accent, and ShamWow-I-got-bit-by-a-hooker Vince, Billy gave credibility to the infomercial form of advertising.

Because of his guy next door personna, you believed him and As-Seen-On-TV products were taken more seriously.

As a marketer who has worked the Home Show circuit, there are tons of "product demonstrators" out there. Some are good, some really suck. Wandering the crowded isles, you can tell who cares about the product they are selling and who is watching the clock for their shift to end. This is one reason Billy was such a great pitchman.

If you've seen the show Pitchmen, which is basically about inventors trying to get Billy Mays and Ron Popeil to endorse their products, you understand the power of the "Hi, Billy Mays here for-" seal of approval. Billy was his own product and also a firm promoter of cool stuff you didn't know you needed, but couldn't possibly live without.

I'm saddened by the ad world's loss of such a great guy. I wasn't going to really post anything about it, but I saw this picture over at Celebrity Pics this morning and decided to scribble/type this.

Thanks, Billy for the OxyClean, but you can keep the Big City Sliders. Rest in Peace...

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Updating My List...Suggestions?

Every four or five months or so, I go through my Google Reader list and update my blog roll on the side of my blog. I love sharing interesting bloggers with others.

I've found some of my favorite blogs from clicking through a link on someone else's site.

Check out my blog roll. Tell me if I'm missing a "must read"...If your blog isn't listed, let me know and I'll make the correction!

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

It only sounds weird out loud

I was discussing our weekend plans with Handsome this evening and one of our friends was over.

After listening to us discuss our plans to see some Civil War re-enactors, the ghost hunters that will be at the museum, and the liklihood of some of our friends passing out as they do outdoor theatre this weekend, she turned to us and said, "You guys live the weirdest life"

Yeah, maybe so, but it's kind of fun.

Help me out, I'm getting my butt kicked

Sooooo...maybe I'm too competitive, but I'd really like to win the Parent's Connect Award for best local KC Blog.

I'm currently getting my ass kicked.

Help a Moxie out?

Since I absolutely don't want to reveal my secret identity to my friends and family, I'm relying on you, Constant Reader, to "vote early and vote often"...

Bookmark the page and vote every day until July 15th.

If you need reminders of why you should vote for me, revisit some of my favorite posts:

The Ghost Posts last October and the fabulous contributions of some of KC's best bloggers


Who else is going to tell you about weird shit you can feed your kid?

Or predict your future?

Or tell you about antebellem underwear?

Or disappearing pennies?

I'd appreciate your support. Tell your friends and family to vote too! I need all the help I can get! You don't need to be from KC for me to be your favorite.

Enough with the shameful begging...look, I'll buy you a unicorn that poops Skittles if you vote for me and I win. It's been a long time since I've won an award for my writing and I crave acolades and meaningless praise, what can I say?

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Go check on your neighbors

It looks like the heat wave has already claimed two victims... This happens every year, but this always makes me so sad.

Please go check on your neighbors. If you're going to be outside, please don't forget to wear sunscreen and drink gatorade.

I'm a pacifist, but I really need one of these!

How fun is that?

Friday, June 19, 2009

OMG!!! The Return of the Naugies!!!

Do you know what's beautiful about the internet?

The absolute randomness.

If you've read my blog for very long, you know I'm slightly irrational at times. And deathly afraid of certain mythical creatures (gnomes!)

Today I was reading through my Google Reader and found this post on Found In Mom's Basement (a retro-fabulous blog of awesome vintage ads)

In case you're too lazy to click thru/in a hurry/more fascinated by my captivating words, this is what I saw.

That slightly frightening mythical creature is known as a Nauga (yes, as in Naugahyde) and is one of the most fabulous marketing ploys ever created.

I have been searching high and low for one of these and/or a picture of him. I, unfortunately, was google searching "Naughies" instead of "Naugas" and hadn't found one so I could explain to Handsome what they exactly were.

Don't you just want to give him a hug?

To be honest, my first encounter with a Nauga was at my grandparents' house when I was a wee lass. He scared the bejesus out of me until my father made up some total bullshit about them really being very good creatures that generally run in packs like wild dogs and help keep monsters out from under the bed.

(I was like 5 or 6, I had an irrational fear at the time, ok? It's not something I like to talk about and to this day I can't sleep without my feet being covered up).

Yes, my father was the most incredible story teller ever. Either that or I was exceedingly gullible. Both of which are true.

I was still slightly skeptical/afraid of this freakish thing that wasn't like any of my other cute stuffed animals, but Grandma allowed me to bring him home and I put him under my bed.

You know what?

He was very good at keeping monsters out from under the bed.

I kept that little sucker under my bed until I moved out for college.

And then, just as fate brought Naugie into my life, it cruelly swept him away.

My mom gave him to Goodwill.

I was a little upset by this, but time heals all wounds and I'm still on the lookout for one of these treasures (Now that I know it's NaugA and not NaugIE, I'm in business.)

If I could read JAPANESE, I could purchase one here...check out the Nauga-fabulous gallery of adoptables.

Sell!Sell! has a fabulous post about the history of the Nauga and some kick ass vintage goodies. You MUST check it out.

Side note of stupidity if you read the post:

*FOOTNOTE: The Nauga was nearly canned before it got chance to run, but was saved by research - albeit some very on-the-hoof research. The Federal Trade Commission in the US claimed the Nauga might be mistaken for a real-life species, and as such could be deemed deceptive advertising. To prove this was silliness, Lois and staff from his agency went down to Fifth Avenue in New York with the Nuaga advertising and asked passers-by "Is this a real animal?". Not surprisingly, the results showed that good old Joe Public had more sense than he/she was being credit for by the Commission, and the Nauga got to live.

Here is an alternative history of the Naugas complete with conspiracy theory goodness...And I am a sucker for that kind of thing...

Currently, in my office at work I have a green naugahyde chair that is just 70's FABULOUS. It was already in my office when I started working at my current job and it's a vital piece of my work success. Everybody likes to sit in the lap of the Big Green Naugie. Who wouldn't right? Especially on a hot, sweaty summer day!

Have a great weekend and if you find a VINTAGE Nauga, let me know. (The new ones aren't very authentic...)

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Typewriters I would love to use...

I collect antique typewriters (anything pre WWII). I even blogged about my love for them.

But I saw this on Mental Floss today and I am now positively green with envy. I would love to see these typewriters used by famous writers.

I long to keystroke their Royals, Remingtons and Olympias...

I have the Remington model that George Orwell and Agatha Christie used...Beautiful light-weight and fabulous!

Monday, June 15, 2009

Emotional, Heartbreaking...I miss you...

Last Saturday, Darling, Handsome and I made our way to St. Louis to walk in the Komen Race for the Cure...I dedicate this to Aunt Angel....

I'm inspired to walk in KC's Komen Walk in August, but since Angel lived in St. Louis and it was her wish...we walked there first.

I got VERY emotional as we got to the finish line. I wasn't expecting that, but, well...it happened. A year and a half really isn't that long when you've lost someone you loved....

Before the Walk....

64,000 people who have been affected by breast cancer is pretty amazing...

We got very emotional towards the finish line. Remembering...Aunt Angel did the the STL Komen Walk every year....Her last was in a wheelchair...

PLEASE, God, let us discover a cure...

Friday, June 12, 2009

Pettiness, Party of One

I want to warn you, Constant Reader, that I fully acknowledge this is a completely petty, and somewhat bitchy post. Read at your own discretion...

Handsome and I have a friend couple that we see on occasion. Mostly at shows and parties and the like, but we have gone out on a few joint couple excursions (usually when I have extra tickets to stuff.) We're not BFF's, more like Party Pals (when we see you, it's cool, if not, meh, not important.) but still, you know, friendly-ish. We both have only one daughter (theirs is a year or so younger than Darling.)

About a month ago, I let Handsome's siblings use our lawn for a garage sale. I decided it was probably time to let go of some of her baby clothes and other assorted unneeded baby paraphernalia. It was also kind of a test for me of whether or not I was ready to have another baby or if we're done. This has been a huge issue for us in the last 6 months or so and I still don't know which way we're going to go.

Needless to say, sorting through baby stuff/sweet memories, made me all weepy and nostalgic (but still undecided). I posted "Moxie is sorting through Darling's baby clothes for tomorrow's garage sale and bawling like a baby" as my Facebook status. Needless to say, that was stupid and I got comment pounced by 6 different people wondering if I was done having kids.

Wife of Friend Couple (WoFC) actually sent me a message wondering if we were done and said that they were struggling with the decision as well. She asked for my insight on why I made whatever choice I had in regards to the future of our family.

I promptly sent her back a big long reply of "We're not sure yet" and spelled out all the issues we were struggling with in the decision. At the end I wished her the best of luck and asked her what she thought and did my response help?

I waited for her reply.

And waited.

Earlier this week I was cleaning up some stuff I could delete in my Facebook inbox and found the message. I thought it was weird she never replied to me and wondered if she even got it. Facebook has been kind of messed up lately and apparently I haven't received at least 2 messages (that I know of) that people have sent me. I worried she thought I was rude and didn't answer her, so a few days ago I sent her a message and asked if she had gotten my first one. (I know that was silly, but that's just how I am)

I still haven't gotten a response and, ya know, I'm getting rather irritated.

We opened an emotional Mama door by her asking such a personal question, which I answered fully and truthfully. You shouldn't just ignore someone's emotional gut spilling.

You shouldn't ask a question without acknowledging the answer.

There was nothing in the email that could be considered offensive to her, and it's just common courtesy to answer back or at least say "Thanks for sharing your thoughts and insight".

I'm being completely irrational and petty, but good manners never go out of style.

I feel like she's purposely ignoring my second email and that just irritates me further. What's worse is she's the type that would get REALLY pissed off if I had done the same to her and she would make a bigger issue out of it. Beyond this little rant, I'll be fine.

Why am I even sharing this petty, irksome, stupid little irritation with you?

I have no idea.

But it feels lovely to rant...


Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Ice Cream that doesn't melt? I'm suspicious.

I am a huge fan of Cold Stone Creamery (but I'll take some good ol' Foo's Fabulous Frozen Custard any ol' day)but I'm a bit leery of their latest product coming out next month.

Ice cream that doesn't melt at room temperature....kind of reminds me of that crappy styrofoam "Astronaut" ice cream you can buy in museum gift shops...

Combining the awesomeness of Cold Stone and the awesomeness of Jell-O Pudding (Is there anything Bill Cosby CAN'T do?!) seems pretty good, but really?

The new product, which is co-branded with the Kraft Jell-O brand name, is a product that is ice cream at cold temperatures, but Jell-O pudding-like at room temperature.

The chain is introducing four flavors that the company says have a texture like mousse. They will be offered at all locations nationwide in July: all stores will offer butterscotch and chocolate versions, while vanilla and banana pudding flavors will be optional.

I'm intrigued...

Even more intriguing are these recipes from Cold Stone for delicious summer treats such as Puddin' Pops, Puddin' Cookie Sandwiches and Butterscotch Trifle in a Cup.

Only problem if you don't live near a Cold Stone? They of course require the ice cream to make them....

This might need an independednt Moxie field test and product review when it comes out. (Or maybe I just want some ice cream...)

Friday, June 5, 2009

RetroGag: The Diet Edition

Everyone's on a diet, right? Diet food sucks, for the most part, right? You accept this if you have to shave a few jiggly rolls of fat.

I maintain that your food shouldn't scare you.

I found these fascinating Weight Watcher's Recipe cards from 1974. They had it hard in the old days...Click through and see the complete collection...

Fluffy Mackerel Puddding

Uh huh. You heard me right. FLUFFY mackerel...mmmmm

Orange Salad

I'd like to think of something wittier than "What the hell's in that bowl-- bong water?!" but it seems to appropriate.

Liver Masque

I don't know what the hell "masque" means in culinary terms, but jello shouldn't be gray and resemble brains.

Spaghetti Jello

"Alright, kids, Mommy hasn't gone shopping yet, let's see what we've got for dinner...We've got clear gellatin, hard boiled eggs, tomato soup and some vinegar...Let's make a super delicious mold!"
(I'm barfing right now, but thanks, RetroFood.com for this one...)

Happy weekend! Remember, don't try these at home!

Making the Grown Up Choice for the Weekend

Since I work every other weekend, my precious free time is well, extra-precious...

What I would like to do this weekend (in no particular order):

~ Hang out with some of my friends and FINALLY go see The Elders play live

~ Hang out with some of my gay friends and support them in their Gay Pride Festivities

~ Hang out with my Handsome and Darling and set up the 4ft x 10ft pool in the backyard. Bask in the freezing water and splash. Convince Darling it's ok to put her face in the water.

~ Splay out on the couch with some Waldo Pizza, a few beers, my Hubby, Daughter and cats. Watch a commercially-interrupted, edited-for-tv movie.

~ Hang out with my BFF for a Girls Night Sleepover. We do this from time to time and other than a funeral, I haven't gotten to hang out with her in 2 months. Eat, drink, stay up late talking . . . sleep late.

What I shall be doing:
~ Hanging out with my BFF, helping her prepare for her garage sale tomorrow morning until the wee hours of the morning, and then get up before 7 to help her be ready for the hordes that descend upon the Lakewood Garage Sale every year.


At least I get to hang out with BFF. I adore her beyond belief and am excited to get to spend some time with just her, but still...this is supposed to be my work-free weekend.

I'm such a damn whiner. I know this. I'll go and have a great time. I'm just work-zapped right now...

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Things I promised myself I wouldn't blog about

I've been seriously neglectful of my hordes (2 or 3 of you) of adoring fans for the last couple of weeks. I'm not even sure why I haven't posted more, but I realized today that I needed to stop neglecting you.

I received a Facebook comment on my status (which was something about wanting to run away and join the circus) from one of my friends/acquaintances:

"I think you should be a writer. Your posts are hilarious. And I think they need better writers in the circus."

And the whole reason for having this super secret Moxie identity and super rocking blog is to vent my feelings without censorship/hurt feelings of those I love and respect.

But, you know, sometimes, Constant Reader, I just don't feel like talking about things that really bother me. But, as someone (and I can't think of who right now) said, "When the itch to write overcomes you nothing can cure it like the scratching of a pen" (or something similar to that).

So, here I am scratching. I have a big mouth/active mind/semi-fast typing fingers, so until it's out, it's still itchy. No more censoring myself about it.

Things that I'm not going to blog about:

1. How nervous I am about Darling starting her Kindergarten camp on the 15th. She's younger than all of the other kids in her class and even though she's razor sharp and she'll be fine, I still worry.

2. How much I wanted to cry the other night when Darling was saying her prayers at bedtime and stopped in the middle of asking God for a baby brother and looked over at me since I told her to stop asking me for one. (I don't know for sure if I can/want another.) I felt like a total piece of selfish shit.

3. How much I'd like, just for once, to receive a decent, meaningful compliment from my boss. As the chief marketing strategist and creative designer, it would be nice to know he acknowledges the fact that I'm trying so hard (and I think succeeding!) to do my part to keep the company afloat in this crazy economy. Something more than a mumble in recognition would be nice. I don't need it all the time, just occasionally. I'll even stop being hurt you ignored my birthday for the last 2 years.

4. How incredibly guilty I feel for needing just a little praise. I'm so thankful to have a job right now it isn't even funny. I really should not be complaining. I really do love my job.

5. How I'd like to have just a little time off to myself, sans-Handsome, sans-Darling, sans-anyotherpersonsproblems. A nice sunny room with a comfortable reading spot. Just for a day.

6. How angry I am at all the people in the world who are saying that because I'm pro-life (with addendums), I'm a horrible person and a right wing nut job. I'd really like to write a post about:
A. How Dr. Tiller was a human being. A father, husband, brother, son, friend to someone. Regardless of how much I disagree with the idea of some late term abortions, I'm still sad that a human being lost his life for absolutely no reason and that his family and friends have lost him.
B. How I am pro-life. Everyone is pro-life unless you're on a homicidal rampage. No one, especially Americans, want to be labeled anti-choice. Just like there are many stages of life, there are many facets to choice. I am very much FOR making good, well thought out choices. I'm irritated to be labeled as anti-choice.
C. The guy who killed Dr. Tiller was a crazy lunatic. To say he represents the pro-life movement in any way is like saying David Koresh is representative of all Christianity, Osama bin Laden is representative of all Muslims or that James Earl Ray was representative of all white people. Stupid.
D. I don't understand protesting outside abortion clinics. They are performing legal services inside the clinic. No American citizen should feel intimidated to go to work/or have a legal health procedure performed. If you don't like the fact abortions occur, take your show on the road to your state capital/Washington and protest somewhere where it might make a difference. Work for legislative change, instead of expressing meaningless symbolic anger. At the same time, you need to be realistic enough to accept that abortion will never be outlawed again.

7. How absolutely asinine I think it is that The Kansas City Star won't print the marriage/civil union announcements of gay couples in their Weddings section. Ridiculous. Wake up and join the 21st century. Just as I accept that Roe vs. Wade will never be overturned, anti-gay marriage people need to just accept that gay people can make life long commitments to one another and should have the legal rights that all other American couples have.

I think for now that's all the "I'm not going to blog about this" stuff I have for now.....