Monday, April 7, 2008

Don't Rain on My Parade (or Opening Ballgame)

So, if I could, I would put a curse on every forecaster and KU basketball fan right now. Not only am I going to have to hear about tonight's basketball game ALL DAY TOMORROW, even while I'm at the Home Opener, but it looks like it's going to rain and be cold.

Both of these things are threatening my usual sunny (ok, partly cloudy/sarcastic) disposition.

But, I shall overcome. You bastards won't bring me down.

KU fans irritate me, but I understand fan loyalty. I get "euphoria". This is your hey day, just don't expect me to roll around in all that hey with you.

I'm particularly irked by the forecasters. Why can't Lezak (or as I call him Mr. Potato Head) get his ass out there and do an anti-rain dance? Katastrophe Katie needs summon her powers and call off the imaginary "Severe Weather" alert demons I bet she's already planning in order to boost KCTV5 ratings. Mike "The Grinning Hair Piece" Thompson needs to quit comparing his package size to Lezak and channel cloud banishing energy. Focus, Mike, FOCUS!!!! (Sorry Busby haters, I like the guy and neither my dad or myself, who enjoy taunting the tv, have ever come up with a decent bash on him).

WHAT DO WE PAY THESE PEOPLE FOR, ANYWAY? I want SHAMEN, not guessers! This is the one day of the year that I expect sunny skies and 70 degree weather. I don't much care the other 364.

Am I asking too much? I don't think so.


Because tomorrow's the Home Opener and I'm a natural pessimist, one of my favorite childhood songs....
Here's hopin' 2008 Royals...hope you'll break this cycle...Also, I love you Amos Otis...even though I played Left Field...

Oh and maybe a little John Fogherty...what the hell!